Our Journey into Parenthood: A Tale of Unexpected Beginnings

Becoming parents is a profound and transformative experience, filled with moments of joy, apprehension, and often, unforeseen challenges. Our journey into parenthood was marked by unexpected twists that would test our resilience and redefine our understanding of vulnerability.

It all began with a seemingly routine day, one of those days that weave seamlessly into the fabric of life until something changes everything. I experienced a bleeding episode, the third one of its kind, and naively believed it was nothing to worry about. After all, I had already faced a major bleed about a month prior, and in my mind, I was cautiously accustomed to these unsettling episodes.

At the time, I worked in the very hospital where I had intended to deliver our baby. Without undue alarm, I made the call to my OB clinic and was advised to head over when I had a moment. Little did I know that this decision would carry profound consequences.

Once at the hospital, I was hooked up to a monitoring machine that tracked the baby's heart rate. To my surprise, I was having minor contractions, and the baby's heart rate was showing concerning dips, signifying her distress. The OB on duty, not my primary doctor, assured me that it would be alright if I went home but expressed a preference for additional monitoring in the labor and delivery unit. It was a choice that would come to weigh far more heavily than I could have imagined.

I decided to return to the hospital for further monitoring, assuring Erik that he need not hurry. Our baby was not due for several weeks, and I had no intention of giving birth that day. Little did I know, fate had other plans.

As Erik finished some chores and made his way to the hospital with my pillow, I suddenly began to bleed profusely, seemingly out of nowhere. My off-duty OB rushed in, asking if I was ready to have our baby. From that point on, my memory of events becomes a blur.

A semi-emergent C-section became an imperative. I recall desperately hoping to hear our baby cry when she emerged. The medical team had prepared me for the worst-case scenarios, and I had signed consent forms for treatments I hoped we would never need. My mind was a whirlwind of emotions, uncertainty mingling with the fragile hope that everything would somehow turn out alright.

Our baby girl, Madison, was whisked away to the NICU immediately after her birth. A team of medical professionals surrounded her, assessing her and providing whatever support she needed. She required CPAP for breathing and had IV lines placed. In that chaotic moment, I asked Erik to stay with Madison. I believed I would be fine and felt a strange sense that, somehow, everything would be okay.

I was transported to my recovery room, and for the next four agonizing hours, I could only wait. The medical staff had informed me that I wouldn't be allowed to see Madison until I regained feeling in my legs. Those hours felt like an eternity.

In the meantime, I had to begin pumping every three hours to stimulate milk production, as my body was not yet ready to produce milk. The anticipation and anxiety gnawed at me as I awaited the moment I would meet Madison.

The following morning, my OB delivered a sobering revelation. I had experienced an almost complete placental abruption, with the placenta hanging by a thread. She told me that had I chosen to return home that fateful day, both Madison and I might not have made it. I carry that knowledge with me every single day—a deep sense of gratitude for the choice I made to stay at the hospital.

Madison spent five weeks in the NICU, her arrival coinciding with a tumultuous time in the world. It was May of 2020, a period marked by the onset of the COVID-19 pandemic and civil unrest in downtown Salt Lake City. As the world seemed to descend into chaos, our lives were forever changed by the arrival of our precious daughter.

Fast forward three years, and Madison is a vibrant and thriving three-year-old. Her premature birth is a fact that few believe when I share our story. We consider ourselves exceptionally fortunate, as everything eventually fell into place.

Our journey into parenthood began with unexpected challenges, but it also reaffirmed our belief in hope and resilience. Madison's journey from a premature infant to a thriving child is a testament to the strength of the human spirit and the enduring power of love. We've learned to embrace vulnerability, knowing that it is through our challenges that we find our greatest strengths.